Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Sister Wives — Season 2011 Recap

Sister Wives — the Brown family that we love to hate.

Although I didn't blog about them regularly this season, I did watch an all-day marathon of this show this past weekend. Don't make fun. The marathon led up to the finale where Wife No. 4, Robyn, gives birth to a baby boy, Solomon, and then ... weirdly, offers herself as a surrogate to Wife No. 1, Meri, who only has one child. Don't they have enough relationship dynamics between them without the added stress of surrogacy?

Anyway, this season was about Kody living in and traveling from house to house in their new home-way-from-home ... SIN CITY, BABY ... Las Vegas. Doesn't seem an appropriate place for this "spiritual" family. The kids aren't happy, and the wives don't particularly like living so far apart (in Utah, they shared a home so the women saw Kody on a daily basis). And, they are trying to start a business ... and I think they've settled on fitness or a gym or something? (Not sure how they are making money now unless it's through appearances and the show or something related to the show.)

So, if they have settled on fitness, they have to get in shape. All the wives are now dieting or "eating healthy" and working with a hunky trainer. Wife No. 3, Christine, seems to really, really like him. Wife No. 2, Janelle (my favorite), is the most focused and admits she has the most weight to lose. I will give them all credit for openly sharing their struggles with weight for the world to see. Gutsy.

So, a new town, new homes, new business and a new baby. It's all about the "newness" this season. Oh, and one other thing, a little jealousy of the new "pretty" wife, Robyn. She's a little thinner, a little younger. The wives may not feel so special with her in the mix. Christine expresses her feelings of "not being special" anymore. Anymore?

In one episode, the women hit the town ... and then Kody does the same with a few buddies. BORING. This group does not know how to party. The women are shocked by the nakedness of Vegas. Really? Kody enjoys the sights ... he kinda said so.

Enough already. The season was not that exciting. It was like watching my neighbors. Nothing shocking or scary or sad. Just a normal family with normal issues.

Do I like the adults of this family (no judging children allowed)? Yes, I think I do. They are all nice people, very normal people is some ways. Do I understand or like their lifestyle choice? No. And, it's not a moral or ethical thing with me. Families today are so diverse ... nothing is surprising. And, I'm definitely a "to each his own" kind of person. If it makes you happy and doesn't hurt anyone, I'm fine with it. It's not a legal consideration for me either. I don't believe they are breaking the law. Kody is only legally married to Meri, so if the other three want to be his "wives" that is their choice. It's not a problem for me.

So why don't I like the plural wives concept? I, personally, would not want to share my spouse or partner with someone else. It isn't special if it's not just between two people. If he has a relationship with other women, you are not the "soulmate" or the only one or the chosen one or the wife or anything. You aren't the most special woman in his life. You never really know how he feels. Is he telling one of the others that she is the "one" or is he telling all the wives the same BS? Kody would say he has separate relationships with each wife. There's something that doesn't ring true there for me. Why does he want or need so many wives? Why do they want to share their husband?

As a woman, I feel like I deserve to have a man that loves me and only me. I want to feel special. I think the sister wives deserve that, too.

I know I can't love but one man. Obviously, the sister wives can't either. Can men really love more than one woman? Are men different? Does Kody really love them equally? Or is there one that really has his heart, and the rest are along to soothe his massive ego?

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Bridezillas - "Cristal & Johanne"

I'm so behind. I haven't been "reality" blogging. I'm looking for a new show to blog about while Bridezillas is on hiatus ... any suggestions?

Cristal, 24, is engaged to marry the meek and mild Adam, 22, in Milwaukee, WI. Theirs is a high school romance that is still going and going ... She wears the pants in the family and admits that he might be the only person that can "stand" her. She shows high levels of "emotional instability" ... that's a quote.

She's abusive to those who are working to help her, to her man, to her friends, to her family. While at a bar, there is an incident where a guy insults her and calls her a cow, and possibly a few other things. She throws a drink on someone because of this ... not sure it's the name caller, but she doesn't really care. Somebody had to pay. The sad thing is that her fiance was along for the ride and never said a word. What a wimp. She's no angel, but you hope the man you are marrying will defend you no matter what. She flirts with his brother ... nothing from Adam. She's called a cow. Nothing from Adam.

These two should both move on. But, instead, there is a wedding. They have made it this long, maybe it's a match. Best wishes.

The bridezilla to end all bridezillas, Johanne, is simply waiting for her man, Ed, to marry her or leave her. Surprisingly, he does the first although he may be looking for a lawyer these days after getting a look at the footage from the show. She's a cheater and a liar. She's rude to Ed, her sister, her mom, her friends, and pretty much everyone who comes in contact with her.

She's not in love with Ed, and I think she believes she is "settling" although that is more true for him. Ed, you can do better. I'm wondering what has become of their relationship? I'm wondering if her "act" was all for the show ... and for Ed's sake, I hope so ... although I'm not sure any normal person would participate in a threesome just to get ratings ... and risk their one real relationship. If she did, she's one of a kind.

Good luck to Ed.

More next season about Bridezillas. I may do a blog or two on Sister Wives this week ... the season is over, but I think a recap might be nice.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Bridezillas - "Daphne & Johanne"

I've been delaying the inevitable. Writing about Johanne. For  two days, I didn't want to think about her. I feel dirty just putting her name on my blog. I said she was the "worst" in my last blog, but she has taken me to new low levels. She was hard to watch, and even harder to understand.

Anyway, she's picking up tuxedos with her brother. She doesn't like the color she chose so it's a redo. In the next scene, she's misplaced her tiara for her wedding. She's searching everywhere through mounds and piles of junk and clothes and crap. She should be on one of those hoarder or messy homes shows. Her place is a wreck. She never finds the tiara, but nobody could find anything in that trash heap. She wants to call off her wedding because of the missing headpiece. There's so so many reasons to call off this divorce-in-waiting that I'm all for it. Because of the tiara? Let's do it. Run for your life, Ed. Please. You will wish you had after you see what happens next ...

Johanne goes on a date (I SAID IT, YES, A DATE) with a friend. Not Ed, her fiance, but some random friend. She meets him at a bar, they drink a little and on the way out the door, he asks her if she wants to come by his place. She asks if the KIDS are there. No, thank God. What about his chick? Yes, she's there. Is that cool? Yes, that's cool. I had to rewind this scene a few times to make sure I understand that he's actually taking someone home from a date to his home and his girlfriend. It wasn't a bad dream. And, if that wasn't bad enough ... Johanne is looking forward to meeting his girlfriend because "she's cute." Then, she's at the house, the girls take a spin on the stripper pole and, SURPRISE, they all end up laughing and playing kissy face on the bed. Lights out. Cameras gone.

Poor, poor Ed. RUN, ED, RUN.

Johanne admits she's not sure she's in love with Ed. I'm pretty damn sure she is not even if she is "iffy" about it. This girl is the WORST. More of her next week. Hopefully, there won't be a wedding.

After Johanne, Daphne looks like a little sweet princess when she is really a whiny, spoiled, pouty little brat. Daphne, 20, is marrying Drew, 28, in Parsons, South Dakota, although they both live in Georgia. It's a wedding by proxy. Others will have to make it happen.

She can't decide on the theme. We have a rainbow-colored cake, Asian-themed bridesmaid gowns, a taste of the military (she served, thank you Daphne) party theme. Doesn't really make sense.

Daphe has changed the "flavor" of her wedding cake and color of her wedding cake at least a dozen times, and that's why she's ended up with the rainbow effect.  By the way, she likes cakes but hates doughnuts. Her fiancee loves doughnuts. She hates them so much that she forces him to eat all the doughnuts at once that he bought when she wasn't looking. She obviously doesn't understand that this is NOT a punishment for a doughnut lover.

She's one of the few brides that gets mad at her friends rather than the hairstylist at her "hair trial." I was mad at them both. The friend was critical, and Daphne overreacted ... so after a thrown comb and a shove, the bridesmaid is out the door. Then, the dress. It's half a dress she picked out, and it's half of her mother's dress. Put it all together and you have a "frankendress." Loved that reference, so I stole it from the show. It's a hot mess and doesn't fit.

It's time to decorate for the big day. So, for her Asian-Military-Rainbow-themed wedding in what looks like an abandoned building, Daphne purchases STREAMERS. Who uses streamers at an Asian-Military-Rainbow-themed wedding? And the streamers are orange and blue, which really doesn't go with the red, white and blue AND rainbow color palette.

The wedding goes on streamers and fold-out chairs and all. But, Drew's parents do not show. They don't approve of the match so they have boycotted the event. I felt sorry for Daphne. She's not that bad. His parents should be thankful she is not Johanne.

Jersey Shore Finale ... Goodbye Italia!

I’m glad it’s over. And,  I think the Jersey Shore gang would agree that their season of pasta and pesto was more internal drama than outside shenanigans. The season ended not with a bang (no pun intended), but with a whimper and a tour. Boring for them and everyone watching.

They partied one last time, cooked together one last time, packed their ludicrous amount of suitcases one last time and said goodbye one last time … until next season when they are back at the Jersey Shore.

They missed the simpler, more sinful times in America. Italy didn’t have the women, the raunchiness, or the "love fest" with them that they have grown accustomed to in Jersey … they looked to each other for entertainment this season. The men were so scarce in Italy that the girls (and I mean the two meatballs .. Deena and Snooki) hooked up with other or tried to “snuggle” with the guys in the house. Snooki got lucky. Deena got kicked out of bed. The guys just gave up.

Jenni quickly became my favorite … serving as a mom and a  mentor to the others. She didn’t do anything stupid or raunchy or ridiculous. Deena remains my least favorite … this girl is lewd and just plain vulgar. The rest fall somewhere in between for me. Snooki and Mike are entertaining. Sammi and Ronnie were not fighting so I have to give them kudos for that, and Vinnie and Pauly D are always the same … these guys never change their clothing style, their hair, their words … but I warn them that everything goes out of style so their time is coming.

Goodbye gang. It’s been awkward. I know several things now:

  1. I’m too old to watch this stuff.
  2. Most people do not act this way.
  3. What was once entertaining is now just offensive.
  4.  I still love reality TV but not this show. They have become stale.
  5. I hate fake tans and fake hair.
  6. I'm glad I was a teenager and a 20-something in a different time.
  7. Short short skirts don't really look that good on anyone.
  8. It IS hard to walk in high heels. 
  9. Don't let someone film you when you are drinking.
  10. Men really do "treat them like they meet them" so girls, please remember that.