Sunday, January 31, 2010

Bonding Time, Dieting Time

My daughter and I have been snowed in for almost three days together, and it's absolutely been great. We haven't had this much time together ... well, since I don't know when. We've watched movies, cleaned house, played games (for those of you who have never played it, Bananagrams is super fun), talked, laughed and even baked a cake.

Which brings me to the next thing she and I are going to do together ... diet. After we almost ate half a cake between us within three days ... mostly out of boredom .... and then listening to "Special K" commercials making us feel guilty and challenging us to their diet over and over on TV, we have decided to take them up on it. As I was eating the cheesy pasta dinner I made for us last night, it sounded like a good idea. I need to lose 20 ... OK, if I'm really honest ... 30 pounds. To me, my daughter doesn't need to lose any weight, but it's her choice. A little healthy eating and exercise could only help me, and it's nice to have a partner.

So, today we hit the grocery store together. And, just so you know, eating healthy is much more expensive that eating not so healthy. I know why people eat food that's not so good for you ... it's much cheaper. Anyway, we bought lots of fresh fruit, chicken, talapia, salad fixins' and much more. We also bought all the "Special K" cereal, protein bars, protein drinks, etc. for our "Special K Challenge." Again, it's a little expensive, but I don't think it's out of line with similar products.

So, tomorrow the Challenge starts. She and I are going for it. I will let you know how it goes.

Friday, January 29, 2010

I'm Annoying

No matter how old your children get, you still worry about them. I don't have to tell any parent or any child about that. If you are an adult, you know your parents still tell you to "drive carefully" or "save your money" or "brush your hair." Wait, that last one is probably only my mom.

My daughter, who is 16, takes my worrying or "nagging" as they call it just a little bit better than my 20-year-old son. She hasn't lived on her own yet so she is still used to it. She can take it. My son can't take it quite so well.

The weather is bad here today, and in preparation of that, I sent him several text messages yesterday to tell him what to do in bad weather. They ran along the lines of the following:

Don't drive in bad weather.

Then later:

Have you paid your bills? It's almost the first of the month. I sent you some stamps.

Then later:

Stay home. Do not drive.

Then even later:

Do you have food? I'm worried about you. Text me and let me know you are OK.

FINALLY, late last night, he sent me the following text:

Mom, quit texting me things I already know. It is the most annoying thing in the world.

I sent him the following text back.

I guess you are OK.

I was just happy to hear from him.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Second Chances

For the second time, my son has gone away to college. He left in 2008, but after just a little too much fraternizing and not enough studying he came home to our local college for a semester. Now, he's going away to college again and, hopefully, this is it. I really don't want to do this again. And, honestly, I don't think he does either. After your kid has a year of freedom, coming home to mom's rules again is no fun for anyone.

I really wasn't quite ready for him to leave home again and live with friends. I wasn't sure if I had really gotten my point across that going to school is a privilege, not a right. And, while you are at school, that is your job. Your job is to study and go to class. Nothing else. Your job is not to go to parties, play Fantasy Football, get the high score on Madden, or spend your mama's hard-earned money.

I expressed my concern to my son and, basically, wanted him to wait one more semester before making the transition. He wanted to go now. He said he felt like he deserved a "second chance."

I thought about that a lot. And, I think he was right. We all make mistakes. I've made plenty. I've gotten a second chance to start over and, if I deserve it, so does he.

Now, it's time for the both of us to make the best of our second chances.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Dependable Me

My daughter had a flat tire. Although I didn't change it myself, I took care of it. I paid for the new tire. I answered her phone call. I was there when she needed me.

My son is moving to a new town, starting a new college. I've loaded up my car, packed his clothes, made sure he has financial aid, registered for classes, has money for rent, clean clothes, silverware, dishes and pots and pans for his house, a dining table to eat on and the list goes on and on.

My point here is that I am a dependable, responsible person. My children know this. I do not let them down. They don't really worry about things because I answer their phone calls, I take of their needs and I make sure they have the things they desire.

I am glad that I have a good job and that I can take care of my own. I am fortunate. My children know who to call; they know who they can depend on. When they need someone to help them, I am always there.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Just Another Day?

Today is my birthday. It's really not a big deal. I wouldn't be upset if you forgot my birthday, but I'm thankful if you remember. My best friend called me this morning to wish me a happy day, then my dad, my mom, my brother, my daughter and my son ... in that order. Then, I got on Facebook and I was overwhelmed with well wishes from childhood friends all the way from California to high school friends from Green Forest, Ark., college friends from everywhere and current "work" friends from Little Rock. It's been really, really sweet. I love my friends and family!

My daughter bought me some gifts, but it really meant something to me that she took me to lunch ... spent her own hard-earned money to buy me lunch. We had a great lunch and a great visit. I'm grateful that my son actually remembered.

So, here's the question? Should I expect more than that from my son? Why is it that girls are expected to remember and then take care of it? And boys ... or men ... just get credit for remembering stuff, and don't actually have to do anything about it? Is that fair? Am I setting up my son someday to be in trouble with his wife or girlfriend for only remembering her birthday and not actually buying the card? I don't know. I've done my best, and I apologize to her ahead of time and take my share of the blame for his raising. And, I will use the old standby ... boys will be boys.