Friday, September 27, 2013

Breaking Bad Finale Predictions

There are a few things I am very sure about as Breaking Bad comes to a close. Albuquerque, New Mexico, does not have a neighborhood watch program. I learned more chemistry on Breaking Bad than I did in high school. And, all bad things must come to an end.

All bad things must come to an end. All bad things must come to an end. I keep repeating that mantra in my head as I think about what might be as the curtain closes for, it might be argued, the best drama ever to grace the small screen. The tag line says it all. There will be no winners, and there never has been for those who dare to ignore the rules, show no mercy, and take chances expecting no consequences.

So, ultimately, who will the writers define bad? And, what would be a perfect Breaking Bad ending to make us all cringe, then nod at the unapologetic, and perfect, closure to this sad story? An ending that makes us all feel purged or, at least, acceptance? To quote Jesse Pinkman, "whatever you think is supposed to happen, I'm telling you the exact, reverse opposite of that is going to happen." Jesse, the mouthpiece for the mind of Vince Gilligan.

The show has it all ... heroes and antiheroes, sadness, occasional humor, lots of jaw-dropping moments, drug lords, murderous psychopaths, long-suffering wives, children, the elderly, and a storyline that is pure sick genius. I never saw that coming ... I've said it a million times as I tried to catch my breath. 

Breaking Bad gives me mad respect for Vince Gilligan, for Bryan Cranston, for Aaron Paul and for my children who kept begging me to watch it (they do know good TV!) and for others who are on the Breaking Bad bandwagon. We are the Breaking Bad family, living in a state of fear and pity for a man we should hate, but we all love. Thanks Vince Gilligan for making us want to hug a homicidal, vengeful, egomaniacal drug dealer! But, we all believe, have to believe, there's some good in Mr. White. He touches something within all of us; what would we do, when all else has failed, to provide for our loved ones? How far would we go? Where would we draw the line? How much meth would we cook? And, does it come in pink?

OK, so we all are desperate for the finale. Let's recap the loose ends and make a few predictions. We all know the writers like to settle things, so our first prediction is that all will be settled. And the second prediction, I'm probably not going to get one single prediction right. I can't think of storylines this evil. 

Who is still alive and bad?

  • Walter White (aka Heisenberg, cancer victim, father, husband, teacher, friend and meth chef)
  • Todd (crazy blue-eyed psychopath who is half of the sweet love story of Lydia and Todd)
  • Uncle Jack and his merry band of neo-nazis
  • Lydia (importer/exporter, wears Louboutins, and, sadly, she's a mom)
  • Gray Matter founders (Gretchen and Elliott Schwartz who may have stolen Walter's research)
  • Saul Goodman (The man that can't take a punch and has a pretentious office but does offer comedic relief and a never-ending desire to help the needy. And by needy, I mean people with lots of money.)

And, who is still alive and good?

  • Skylar, Walt Jr. and Holly 
  • Marie (it's debatable, she steals spoons)
  • Jesse Pinkman (the moral compass of the show although it's probably not pointing due north)
  • Brock (poor motherless child)
  • Huell (poor clueless security guard)

What are the loose ends?

  • The money
  • Gomey and Hank are still buried in the desert
  • Lydia 
  • Brock
  • Jesse
  • Todd
  • Uncle Jack and his fun-lovin' followers
  • Skylar, Walt Jr. and Holly
  • Marie
  • Gray Matters
  • Walter White 

Random, Completely Unfounded Predictions

Lydia spurns Todd's advances so he calmly kills her and takes her Prada handbag as a souvenir. 
Walt meets her at Breaking Bad's favorite diner where he replaces her packet of Stevia with Ricin. She's then dead again. No matter what, I doubt she survives the finale.

Uncle Jack and his killer crew
Uncle Jack and his faithful southwestern bandidos are killed by Walt and his new gun purchased outside of Denny's.
Something like that. They are going to die, and Walt is going to kill them.

Todd meets his demise separate and part from his Uncle and the gang. Jesse escapes his cage/home and, despite the Ben and Jerry's ice cream that Todd brought him, he hasn't quite forgiven Todd for the beatings, the murder of Andrea, the murder of Drew Sharp (saddest, worst moment ever on TV) and several other bad things so Jesse kills Todd.
Walt shoots Todd as part of the attack on Uncle Jack. Todd can't survive, that just wouldn't be right. And, it would be downright torture to the fans if Hank is dead and Todd lives.

Gray Matter 
As Walt was ready to turn himself in, after harsh and unforgiving words from his only son, he happens to catch a TV interview with his former Gray Matter friends, Gretchen and Elliott. They dismiss Walt as someone who gave them the name of company. Nothing more. And thus they become another loose end for Walt to tidy up. The gunfire will pour upon their heads.
Walt whips up a concoction and blows the Gray Matter building to smithereens.

The Safe Zone

Marie, Walt Jr., baby Holly and Brock are safe. Skylar, although safe, may end up cradling a dying Walter in her arms as the lung cancer finally beats him. But, she will end up with the Walter White lottery payable in barrels of cash. Walt is not going to give up trying to get the money to Skylar, even if Walt Jr. doesn't want it. We can't trust Walt Jr. with money decisions because, like most teenagers, he has never paid a bill in his life and doesn't understand why Skylar might need, or desire, the money. Walt understands this, and we know Skylar has a little bit of bad girl in her. Skylar ends up with some money, whether it is in barrels or a duffel bag.


Jesse probably kills Todd. We all hope he kills Todd. Although Jesse may survive the physical torture, he will be mentally scarred by the loss of all those he has loved. He's unstable. Maybe he kills himself. If he doesn't die at the hands of Todd or Uncle Jack and his posse, he will probably live. The true justice would be if Jesse survives and just walks away. Hmmm, would it make sense for Jesse to walk away with some of the money? Fate, yeah.


Walter has bought a big gun. He will kill people with this big gun which includes, most likely, Uncle Jack and those other guys, some Gray Matter people, and maybe Lydia. He probably won't kill Jesse, although Jesse may end up killing Walt. Walt's primary goals at this final juncture is to seek revenge and give his family money. He is a dying man with nothing left to lose. He may take the Ricin himself. There's no way Walter White survives the shows finale. He is the No. 1 bad thing that must come to an end.

Things That Might Happen

  • Maybe the show begins with the DEA at the desert burial ground of Gomey and Hank. It's a loose end, they should be found. 
  • I can not even predict what happens to Marie. Probably just living her sad, little klepto life.
  • Saul is really living in Nebraska. Or maybe he has ventured on to Vegas. I don't think we will see him in the finale.
  • Maybe they fish Huell out of some reservoir or desert cave or whatever New Mexico has to hide things in. Or maybe he is still just waiting in that hotel room.
There are no happy endings here. There will just be a cringe-worthy, hand-wringing, screaming ride for who those who are tuned in and have the guts to hang on. Vince Gilligan is looking to go out in Breaking Bad style. We might not be happy, but we will be satisfied that the show has stayed true to its nature.

All bad things must come to an end; I wish that didn't include Breaking Bad.

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