Saturday, August 21, 2010

Jersey Shore ... Breakin Up

Jersey Shore

OK, Sammi is done with Ronnie. Wait, that was the last episode. Wait, that was 10 minutes ago. She's done with him after he calls her a name. She's done with him after he leaves her begging on the side of the road. She's done with him after she stays home waiting for him, and he's out partying with the guys. Every time, she forgives him and confesses her love later. She admits she's happier with him than without him. I just feel bad for her. He is not worth it.

At one point, the group goes to a club and Ronnie, as is the norm this season, gets very, very drunk. Sammi plays the good friend and helps him home, gets him to go bed, puts a pot (why a pot, get a wastebasket girl!) by his bed and takes care of him. We watch him stumble around, do a face plant in a beanbag chair, and even get to hear him throw up (thanks MTV) ... Sammi helps him through it all. She confesses that she has "never seen anyone so wasted." Really? Isn't this her second season on this show?

So, in this episode .... we're forced to watch Ronnie drink again, Ronnie fight with Sammi, and Ronnie act a fool. Just like last episode. It's almost, not almost, IS, agonizing to watch Sammi suffer. She loves Ronnie and he probably loves her in some weird as-much-as-he-is-capable-of way.

At one point, the long-suffering Sammi tells Ronnie it was a "test" when he went out with his friends. She told him she said he could just to see if he would! Did she just meet him? Or does she know any guys his age? Ronnie laughs later and says he doesn't like tests and that's why he didn't go to college. Let's be real ... that ain't why the boy didn't go to college.

Everyone in the house knows that Ronnie is not treating Sammi right, and for some reason, they think Angelina should tell her. Not getting that. When Sammi is watching this show right now, she may be mad at everyone ... but she should just be mad at Ronnie. He looks bad, not her. He's easily my least favorite of the bunch. And Angelina is on the show. And, I'm afraid of Jenni.

Snooki and Jenni are struggling with what to tell Sammi so Jenni has a "genius idea" ... an anonymous letter! No one will ever guess they wrote it. They go to a Cafe and, as the English majors that they are, start composing. My daughter immediately noticed ... "they used plural instead of possessive for waitress" ... she's 17. I guess they should stick to their day jobs ... uhh ... Anyway, we don't see them give the letter to Sammi ... next episode.

Snooki was at her best in this episode. In the first five minutes, she's in several screaming fights with her boyfriend on the telephone and then she says that men just don't know how to talk to or treat women and gives us her take on statistics .... "that's why the lesbian rate keeps going up in this country." Classic.

As in the last episode, the guys (never the girls and I am all about that) try to cook again. And, as in the last episode, dinner ends up on the floor. However, they make the best of it and dinner ends up on the table. After dinner, they decide on some weird game of 20 questions and the girls want to dress "sexy" for the game. OK, I'm old and I don't get it! Somebody help me here. Angelina once again can't get it quite right and overdoes the sexy outfit, and gives Vinny the chance to show off the line "Victoria should have kept that a secret."

Favorite Moment: These guys don't like smart girls, so if you are in college, forget it. Some law students (cute girls) came in the gelato shop and the guys weren't interested in because those girls were studying for finals. You better fail your ACT or some damn IQ test if you want to date these guys and they mean it!

Why Does Mike Seem Like The Adult? The entire cast is so moronic, especially Ronnie and the girls, that Mike actually seems like the adult here. He's almost tolerable.

Next up, I think Hoarding and Bridezillas ...

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